The Law of the Garbage Truck

I am going to post here a story that was a part of the farewell speech that my younger sister's school principal gave today at her Citation Ceremony. I would normally not take notice of the usual inspirational and motivational things that the school principals and teachers say, heck, they are all almost the same. As a matter of fact, I remember the day we had something similar in Modern Bk, but I don't think that it really meant too much to me and I don't remember a single thing of the speech that the dear principal had given. *Yeah, I was not interested coz I was not attached to the school, I was there for the last two years and that is one of my major regrets- Changing my school* Any way- I am very attached to Sister's school and the way her schooling has gone. Being 7 years younger to me, I had an opportunity to relive my school life all over again during her years in school.

So today when her Principal bade their batch farewell and bestowed them with love, affection and wishes, she also gave them and all of us present at the ceremony a beautiful thought through the story that I am reproducing below. It is called 'The Law of the Garbage Truck' (Follow the link to access more information on the main person behind this whole thing) and it goes like:

"How often do you let other people’s nonsense change your mood? Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss, or an insensitive employee ruin your day? Unless you’re the Terminator, you’re probably set back on your heels. However, the mark of your success is how quickly you can refocus on what’s important in your life.

Sixteen years ago I learned this lesson. And I learned it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here’s what happened.

I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when all of a sudden, a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, the car skidded, the tires squealed, and at the very last moment our car stopped just one inch from the other car’s back-end.

I couldn’t believe it. But then I couldn’t believe what happened next. The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started yelling bad words at us. How do I know? Ask any New Yorker, some words in New York come with a special face. And he even threw in a one finger salute! I couldn’t believe it!

But then here’s what really blew me away. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was friendly. So, I said, “Why did you just do that!? This guy could have killed us!” And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, “The Law of the Garbage Truck™.” He said:

"Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they look for a place to dump it. And if you let them, they’ll dump it on you.

 

So when someone wants to dump on you, don’t take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Believe me. You’ll be happier."

So I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me? And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the street? It was then that I said, “I don’t want their garbage and I’m not going to spread it anymore.”

I began to see Garbage Trucks. Like in the movie “The Sixth Sense,” the little boy said, “I see Dead People.” Well now “I see Garbage Trucks.” I see the load they’re carrying. I see them coming to dump it. And like my taxi driver, I don’t take it personally; I just smile, wave, wish them well, and I move on."

I was very taken aback when I heard this. And, I could not help but share it with you all here, because, I know that this story has influenced me and loads of ways.

Take care and Cheers to you all! 

 

"The annual report 2010"

Dear all,

This is the new chapter on wall-mag - Annual Report . its just the analysis of our page on a yearly basis ... Its actually needed as this page is heading towards slow death - no of posts n also comments r decreasing day by day.

Break up of post :

Raj - 28 (even i am surprised on this figure)
Raths - 16
Sakshi- 15
Ankit - 9
karma -9
Shayon - 4
ayesha - 2
Rajorshi, Chiru , Samik , dion , dipayan - 1.

During the first half of the year the page was more happening as more writers used to contribute. In the last quarter only me , raths n sakshi had written anything..

Surprising fact is that there was not a single post from Manvender n Atri the whole year ... and both of them are regularly reading the comments ...

Karma and Ankit , we want u back ...

Dion ,u ass hole , dont u have one hour the whole year to write three - four posts.

Shayon, dude u are the blogger guru for us , we want more from u ..

The new entries share more about yourself ...

This wall mag is our dream n we all need to keep it alive ...
write anything , just anything.. I have seen that it takes not more than 15 min to put up a post ... we all can take two hour in 365 days to write some eight posts ..

many of us are in different countries , u all can share some of ur experiences ...

arre bhai log , when i can write in my tuti footi english then why not u guys...

njoy ...

"A day without my Blackberry"

I did it ... in less than six months my Blackberry crashed .. Its OS got corrupted ...

two days back , i was uploading a pic when my phone hanged ... I switched it off n after that it never started ...

i got tensed , not because my phone is screwed up (its in warranty) but because how would i survive without it ...

all these happens when you are not with ur best companion :

1) you start getting bad dreams if it takes more than a day to get fixed , how would you contact the work - all those social networking n status updates .

2) how would you chat with your friends especially the one living out of country .

3) while driving i saw something that should be clicked but the very next i realized i am not with my BB.

4) you gonna miss push mail n blackberry messenger .

5) when holding any other phone you will feel inferior . people will ask u , what happend to your blackberry

6) you will feel as if ur hands r cut .

it was a tough 24 hrs without my BB .

I have got it a few hours back and i am feeling so relieved ..

I too have something to say !!

Hey every one !!!

Initially i thought of putting it as comment but i guess it would eat up large space !!!!

So in this way post pop up

Well thanks for your sweet wishes for me sweety

I hope they works !!

BTW Uncle Sam seems not so pleased on seeing me on his land, throwing bunch of challenges towards me.Any way i will surely let you guys know about them.

I thought a lot about relationship & money and i think i have gone through both of them and experienced enough to share my views!!

I would prefer relationship , don't ever dare to loose it if you believe you got the perfect one !!

Money can come to you anything when you work your ass off what about a reliable relationship which you always dreamt of !!

Very slim chances of being lucky twice !!

Well once i had a relationship, trust me i was on top of the world even though not enough money to buy house or go for expensive trip

Still i had some one to depend on....i lost it

Now i have enough money to do everything we could have thought of doing still i don't feel like doing it.I get no happiness in money the way i use to in that relation

i accept money gives you financial support.................but just financial support............

Think before it is too late.

Is it all about the Money, Honey?

Raj sent me a sms in the morning today, asking me to put up a post here. And later  realised that I had actually not written a post here for like the longest time.
 But before I leap into the actual context of the Post, couple of things that I want to say *not related to the post*

Aisha- Best wishes for your future in the country of Uncle Sam! I really hope that your new start brings in loads of hopes and loads of dreams that come true.


Mannu- You have stopped posting anything barring the comments.


Rathz, Dino & Karma- Same as above. Karma darling- you don't even post comments!


Chaki- Man, you gave me such a huge nice cute little answer to the query about your honeymoon that I fell over! And better than Rajasthan, how about Rann of Kutch, Gujarat! Supposed to be Romantic, or so Mr. Bachchan says! ;)

And now back to the post!

Raj, your last post has inspired this post.

It is such an inadvertent battle between being financially strong and being able to have THE personal life which is nothing short of being perfect. The delicate balance between the right job, the right salary and the right person in your life is so delicate that even if one has a little more priority over the other, the other suffers the loss!

In my line for instance, the Supreme Court of India has many female lawyers, but very few are in the category of being 'great'. And 90% of those great advocates- Are either not married or are divorced. And the ones who are married are married to lawyers, so in that sense they are not really worried about the career aspect!
As far as my boss is concerned- She has the most convenient set up, she married a German. And he stays there, she here.
It is such a irony, that at the end of a hard days work, you have no one really to appreciate your hard work, or that someone to hold you when you have had a bad day.

On the other hand, I have no idea, why is it that a person who works very hard during the office hours and goes back to his family and refuses to do over time, especially when it is not required is labelled as incompetent.
And, I exemplify this. My grandfather and my father, both of them, never worked beyond 6-6.30 as lawyers. Yes, they worked on Saturdays and Sundays but only when it was required. But in my office, if I even think of stepping out at 6.30 in the evening, I am eyed like I have done a mortal sin. There are two other seniors who work under my boss but they never seem to have any social engagements. They stay alone. Without a family.
But, so does Shayon, and trust me, I know he has a million things to do once he gets back home apart from meeting me after office (which happens rarely). But they, they have no dinners, no festivities, and no personal life as far as I know. Not that they are not nice or anything but it amuses them, as to why would I be so interested in going for the family dinners, or the weddings... etc. And, I fail to understand that why would they not have a social scene. *I may be presuming, but if they don't get out of office before 10 in the night, and work on Sundays and holidays, my presumptions might be correct*

We all work our asses off just to have the comforts of our lives, but in working our asses off, in attaining the heights of our careers, we leave behind that very person with whom we want to share our success.
The money may satisfy the parents, and may buy us the house, but what is the point of all the money when that house will not have the people whose love and care would make it a home...??

I am going through a lot of this myself, in a bid to work super hard, I have been ignoring my relationship with Shayon. Not something that I am proud of.. but my confusion increases many fold when I sit back and realize that I am just 7 months old in my profession, and that this is my time to work. But then ignoring people, places especially my relationship is not ME. What do I compromise on? The best working years by taking a sub-standard unchallenging job? or Keep my relationship(s) as the lowest rung priority and fight with all my might at the job front?
To be honest- I am trying to create that balance- but the thing is- I am afraid that in trying to keep every one happy- I might just lose the person that I am, within me!

Relations, commitment , career and confusion !!!

friend 1 says me :
I used to love a girl deeply n madly . She wanted to marry me . I said I had to build my career for next two years so you have to wait for me . She couldnt wait because its a long wait for a girl .
Last year she got married . I thought I would get over her but I was wrong . Today is her birthday and I called her to realize that she is the only girl I had ever loved .

friend 2 says :
we both were into relation . one day she said me something that hurt me n i didnt talk to her for next one year . She tried to to call me a million times but i ignored her. Few months back I got a mail of her wedding invitaion. I called her up n got to know that she was trying to contact me to ask for marraige.

friend 3 says:
She was my best friend . We were together for long time n knew every minute detail of each other . She expressed her feelings towards me . I told I have never thought about you more than a friend .To my surprise she continued to love me and take care of me . I didnt realize her importance till the day when she came to me to give me her wedding invitation ..I couldnt get anyone like her after that.. Now I know she was the one ..

Well guys these are not some movie scenes . Its real stories my friends told to me in past two weeks .. So I thought , why not have a analysis of this situation .. The discussion is needed for my fourth friend ...
"His condition is that he has taken break from his relation to choose from his career and relation ..."

Love - I used to say that you can fall for any person who will take care n make u special ... But I think you stop at some point . You are lucky if you realize that on time ... In all above three cases the realization was too late . In between came career n ego ...
Love is such a pure thing that it can never hold ego ...
Career can always go hand in hand with love. I have a live example of this . There was a friend of mine in tata motors . He was in love with a girl who was of different caste n also elder than him ... In addition to this he wanted to do MBA and also he was not having too much of money as he has just joined the company .. Inspite of all these challenges he married her . He also fulfilled his dream of MBA n now he is in one of the IIMs.

in words of my 1st friend "sala ek to 60 saal ki choti si jindgi hai , aadhi life to career banane mein chali jaati hai aur baaki ghar basane mein . jo chaha wo kabhi nahi mila . isliye agar koi pasand hai to bol do kyonki doosra chance nahi milega."

love n enjoy

Road to becoming an UNCLE

My dear friends, this is my 1st post and hopefully not the last . I am really sorry that I couldn’t put this post on time due to my lack of knowledge in blogging. U must be laughing that a guy working in software doesn’t know how to blog? But that’s me who knows only how to do time pass in office.

Mr. Raj Alexzander has been persuading me for quite sometime now to put on a post regarding my marriage which I hope you all are aware of. But trust me I tried my level best to live upto the expectation. I also requested Raj to put the post on my behalf and I would have approved it. Even I asked him if it was ok if I give him the typed matter and he would post it. But this fella rejected all my suggestions and finally I am bound to do it on my own L

Ours is a Love, Arranged, Combined & even better keep it as a Complicated marriage as I call it. Also there is no particular order of which happened 1st eg: love followed by arranged or arranged followed by love. I leave this decision entirely on you folks as Im very much confused myself.

The story dates back to 30th September 2008. I had a terrible break up as some of you must be knowing. Following which my relatives were bound to get me married. Since there was single at that time so they were very glad to chose someone of their choice. They went to such an extent that they didn’t even bother to ask me of my requirements, the type of gal I want, etc etc…. they were happily seeing some girls without my knowledge. It’s not that they wouldn’t have asked my decision at the end. But the whole episode of doing things without my knowledge really pissed me off. Luckily one of my cousin sisters leaked out the info to me.That time I really missed my mom the most. Had she been there maybe no one would have tried such things. The worst part was they wanted some good 4-5 yrs age difference between us which Im dead against of. I would prefer someone of my age or at the most 2 yrs. How can I be friend with a gal who is some 5 damn years younger to me.

So I decided enough of this shit and I need to find someone for myself. One day I mustered up courage and told my relatives that they never bothered to keep me informed so I would look for my soulmate in these marriage portals. They were surprised a bit but they accepted as they thought how can I find someone online and that too before them J. But say it destiny or luck, I succeeded in my mission. She had sent me a proposal and I accepted it but there was no way we could communicate since we both were unpaid members. These portals are also very clever they don’t allow you to communicate any further unless U pay them. So there was just 2 options left before me
Forget her since I cannot contact her
Pay the portal some money so that I could view her phone no, mail id, etc...
But I had another option up my sleeve, “ORKUT”. Hail Orkut Devta. I searched her in orkut and yes I found her. There was no limits to my rather our joy and how we dodged the marriage portal. Even then I should thank it coz at least it introduced us and Orkut in uniting us J

So far its arranged I guess If im not wrong. From her side it was completely arranged coz her profile was created by her parents. We started speaking over the phone and my discarded RIM came back to life once again after a hibernation of 6 months. Very soon we became very close to each other and I had already revealed my past to her. She was a bit hesitant in the beginning but she liked my honesty and my courage that I had the guts to handle all these on my own. I had already decided after a few conversations over the phone that yes this is the girl that I was looking for even though I never saw her or met her. I fell for her inner beauty as I always believe that external beauty fades away with time but it’s the inner beauty that rejuvenates with passing time. She is the person who can look after my falling apart family after my mom’s demise. I could share every thing with her be it bad or good. 2008 was a year of great loss 1st mom and then the breakup. So 2009 started on a positive note.

But the real drama is yet to begin. I revealed her to my family and they were awestruck. Im not very open to my dad so couldn’t tell him directly. So I had to take the help of my relatives. But the matter worsened only after that. They were completely against it as they felt that someone might be trying to fool me online. They were not ready to accept the fact that I have selected someone. In India there is a huge problem of caste and religion. But I realized that no matter what you do to please your family they will never accept it directly and trust me she is from the same caste and religion.

I met her for the 1st time during pujas of 2009 ie.6 months after we started talking. After meeting her I was dead sure that if I marry I would marry her only and re confirmed my stand on her to my family. Then my dad also pitched in the revolt. In short I was the only one and she behind me fighting against my entire family. Only I know what I have been through these 2 yrs trying to balance both sides and taking the blows on myself. She also wanted to have some settlement soon which is understandable, need to keep my dad happy also and in between I was the sufferer. At times I though of putting an end to all these but trust me more than me its was her determination that finally brought us where we are today. I was falling apart in all these arguments, fights allegations, etc etc. but it was she who never lost hope and always gave me that encouragement to carry on. Maybe if my mom was there things could have been much simpler L . We had countless fights and all had some links somehow that we are unable to reach a settlement.

Finally on 24th Nov 2010 my dad agreed to give the green signal for 8th Feb 2011 after a heated argument and trust me many ice were broken between me and my dad because of this. Now we talk more freely than before J
My family still feels that its love from my side but I know it was arranged from my side. So its upto you people to decide what this marriage should be called, Love, Arranged or Complicated…..If you have any other name then please let me know J

I know I have left out many incidents and many points that could have been written but the post is getting too long and boring I guess. Will tell you once we meet if you are interested though J.

BTW I forgot to introduce her only.
Name - Nibedita Dutta.
Home town Balasore (Orissa)
Currently doin Msc (Maths)
Quit her DRDO job for Higher Studies (I was so happy that I need not earn anymore and quit my job with pride………damn she ruined my dreams)
Excellent cook and loves studies (surely opposite poles attract)
Hates everything that I consider as my quality or I like ….. After all its gals nature :-P. But I still LOVE her.

I will send out an official invite to all of You but hope to see you all on 8th Feb Kolkata, 13th Feb Dhuburi(Assam), 18th Feb Balasore & Hyderabad party TBD. Total of four receptions planned. Hope to see you people atleast in one of them if not more…………….

Happy New Year!

The end of another year.the starting of yet one more!
Well, it's an opportunity to begin anew, it's a time to make new resolutions,think about the new goals to achieve and make the plans ahead.
I wish all the members of our brotherhood a great and rocking 2011!
May we individually and collectively be happier than we ever have been ! :)