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Honarificabilituditatibus !!

Kelvin knew it from the beginning and he followed his principles; which will not be a conscious effort from him but rather a habit, a character attribute. He is known in the neighbourhood as the 'infinite cool' guy with his gentle and charming nature. The girls of the locality loved the cool guy but our 'infinite cool' guy was also an 'absolute zero'. He never really intercepted or responded to any of the signals.

If Kelvin is our meekly guy, who we may think as a hero in this little story, then we also have a villain. His name is Pascal and he has a ugly gang called Cabinet. Everyone knew him as Big P. He is fat and does not have any manners; scratching and spitting in public being his favourite pastimes. When he anchors his heavy legs and starts cursing a local kid while his Cabinet isolates the kid in the middle of a public place, then that kid will become a wimpy person for life. Unfortunate. Gabbar would be put to shame by Big P. There is one and only way to escape the wrath of Big P. Say the L word and you are free to go to your mother unharmed. The F word is known to everybody, Big P had made his own dictionary and the L word was his favourite.

Kelvin is little different as he is the cool guy. He has a control on his temper and could withstand hostility. So, he is the natural enemy of Big P. No torture could force our meekly cool guy to say the L word. Big P even tried his deadly crocodile death roll but mental or physical, no pressure from Big P aka Pascal could deter our 'absolute zero' with his 'infinite coolness' to buckle and say the L word.

Sometimes situations become really frustrating and during these angry moods, Kelvin feels the need for the L word and remembers Big P's ugly dictionary. Kelvin will remember his father's words "Life’s disappointments are harder to take when you don’t know any swear words". Gradually Kelvin will learn some basic vocabulary and top that up with a bang on a table in angry moods.




It so happened one day, Big P was being sent across to the West coast for good. He was notorious but good. He made the kids stronger to take on the cruel world. He used to force the kids to get out from the safety of their cocoons. He also gave them good food sometimes. Kelvin knew all this. So, he broke away his shackles, in a way, as a farewell token. He wrote the L word and signed Kelvin.

Adios.

Comments

Sakshi said…
Nice post! :)
Except- What is the 'L' word?
Unknown said…
Sakshi - It's a fictional word ;)

Does this post make any sense, I feel I am unable to put a suitable end, may be I need time to develop proper structure and substance.

Raj - Kuch samajh aaya :P

I don't want the explain the context and everything, fir mazaa nahi aayega..Decipher as you may like to !
raj alakshendra said…
abe hawa hi nahi laga :( ..
i think for other too the post is not so clear :p
WTF?
That's my only comment! Ha ha ha ha, Bouncer!

D
Karma said…
I think Big P,West Coast and "L" does ring a lot of bells to me.....I think Kelvin still cudnot spit out the word the best he cud muster was an SMS...(signed msg service I mean) when Big P was being send off

Big P has not only has kicked the butt of Kelvin but several others who still holds the same reverence for him.....
raj alakshendra said…
koi mujhe clear karega what the post was all abt !!!
samik said…
Hahaha.. Big P should read this post.I met Big P recently.He has added lots of new L-words in his dictionary which makes all of his sentences full of L-words.He is a real talent.
Unknown said…
Finally..hahhaha..it's making some sense..

ye, I mailed Big P on completing this post..


****
Sakshi said…
Okay, Now I officially want to know, what the HELL is going on here?

@Rathz
I did sorta understand the post (operative word being 'sorta'), but now with the conversation between you, Karma and Samik, there more context to this post than what is on the surface.

EXPLAIN! Please!
raj alakshendra said…
@raths
Don't try to test the patience of a lady ;) ...
After reading the comments of u three even m thinking what this all is about n getting frustrated too !!!
@ Raj,
I think the 'L word' is similar to the L-Singh we had in college!
I think, but I can't be certain!
And Kelvin may be Rathz or Rudra (but I'm leaning towards Rathz because he Karma and Sam worked together)- I've never/rarely heard him you profanity!
@ Rathz,
I hope I'm not spoiling the post with my explanations to Raj (they may be wrong)!
@ Sam,
You're a regular now!
@ Karma,
Nice to hear from you after a long time.
@ Sakshi,
Don't be offended, this is a bouncer to most of us- maybe we'll get an explanation soon.

D
Unknown said…
Dion - wtf ;)

Yeah, that day I was irritated and angry, all I can manage to say was S***..

So the post came up for the lack of any strong vocabulary..

Everything in the post has a meaning, everything! bujho to jaaney !!!

On a serious note, I tried to form a story taking real characters within a fictional set-up but could not do justice to my thoughts.

Anyways, go *****CENSORED********
Unknown said…
@Sakshi
I have to keep the page clean .... eeks !
I liked the story. It was possibly allegorical to what we had in college. We faced bad people but in the end they only helped us grow. Also,Big P somehow reminded me of Vipul . He irritated the hell out of people and now he's no more there.
sandeep said…
Hahahaha...nice one ratz!!!

special post taking me bak to the gud old kolkata days ;)

btw...first para thoda jyada tha..esp 'The girls of the locality loved the cool guy but our 'infinite cool' guy was also an 'absolute zero'. He never really intercepted or responded to any of the signals.' ! itna bhi mat phek :)
Unknown said…
@Mannu
The allegorical term was taken from the bygone college days but THAT is it. Just borrowing the term 'cabinet'.

Yes, Vipul, he many times had pain attacks (May be real and sometimes may be fake), particularly when Madhu ma'm would be around and she as always sympathetic towards him..haha..Lots of energy in this big guy though..RIP..

@Wrangs
haha..so you enjoyed..gives me joy..

well, first para is exaggeration alright, but there some truth in it ;) haha

Cheers
u'r madhu mam is my mother...
and she is very responsible and very carrin' and lyks me she alwayz..
took care of u all
dis is very well known to u

and d second thing..
whenever i cme to dis blog i find my mother's name..

plz.. bhaiya.. don't drag my mother's name here...
raj alakshendra said…
@ Srishti 
Well a humble sorry from all of us ... And we would take care that its not repeated ...

And thanks for being a regular visitor to this page ...
Sakshi said…
@Srishiti

Okay listen, none of us here would intentionally hurt your mom or your mother's feelings. Tell me something, when you were in school/college, din't you poke fun at your teachers? That is what all the kids do.
That does not in any way mean that we are derogating your mother.

As a matter of fact, mu mother too is a teacher, and I know a lot of kids who would poke fun at her for whatever reasons! But that does not mean that we take offence!

I am again telling you, its all just the whole college masti and nothing to offend your mother. You should please try and take things in your stride.
Alright!

And, we are very sorry that you felt that we were disrespecting your mother.
@Shakshi
i m nt takin any offence..
bt d thing is dat my mother had seen it several tyms and said me to stop u all to do these things.. again
raj alakshendra said…
Let's close up this chapter ...
Unknown said…
Okay... I tried my best to keep myself out of this.... but curiosity got better of me, I guess.

@Srishti: What you mean to say is that Madhu Ma'am is aware of this blog and visits it often times?
Sakshi said…
@Srishti
My name is spelled as SAKSHI!
And, now that you have enlightened us about your mother's visit to our bog, we will make sure that her name is not 'dragged' into the blog.

But I reiterate, that we mean no disrespect, but just remembering the fond memories vide which we were remembering the days in college.
raj alakshendra said…
Now this is gonna be interesting ... Both shayon n sakshi on the battlefield ...

Btw Its nice to hear that madhu maam is a regular visitor to this page ... Guys , it seems v r quite popular ...
Unknown said…
@Sristhi

Sincere apologies if anything said here during friendly banter caused any discomfort.

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I recorded this bit when Sam came to Bangalore... quality of the video is poor. enjoy.