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No wonder he's called A-BC

At the onset,let me apologize for being late in posting the entry again.I've been really busy over the past few days due to a certification exam which I have to take.In this post,our very own cabaret-cum-bellydancer-turned-tippler -the great Atri Mahapatra shares an anecdote of his daarubaazi days.Since he had been my rommie for two years,I wanted to write something about this great personality whom we had named "The man with a question mark on his face" due to an ever confused countenance on his face and ever agape mouth mumbling something in Bengali but Alas!I wont be able to do justice to him now due to lack of time and due to the length of the entry which he has submitted.
Without taking anymore time,here we go with ABC's Story of a Tippler in it's original form.
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Friends, while going through this article don’t just read it….put yourself in this situation and try to feel it. I don’t know whether it is wackier or not, but when I asked MBA that I am going to post an article about a tippler he readily agreed. I used to do lot of wackier things since my college days. Most of them I forgot, as in a day I used to do 86400 wacky things. But this thing I will ever remember in my life..

It so happened that I had a chance to go to Bangalore as a part of our Industrial Tour. We had to meet our customers- Toyota & Ford. We reached Bangalore on Sunday. I thought it is better to meet our seniors in Bangalore rather than wasting my time in the hotel room. I called up Sourav da and he came to pick me up. We spend some time in buying some stuffs and then went to his flat and decided to have chicken and lots of vodka and rum……Very good………. There were around 6 people so accordingly we bought two 350 ml bottle. Now, came the time for eating and drinking. When we opened the bottle all 4 of them started giving some excuses or the other , leaving two of us with two 750 ml Old Monk in our hands….hmmmm. ….I was in a mood of having chicken and Old Monk …so I thought arree baas I got an opportunity of having full 750 ml Old Monk along with chicken. Both of us started eating and drinking when Sourvda said “please finish the rest...I can’t have it….It is enough for me”. When I looked at his bottle I found there is hardly any difference between a full 350ml bottle and what he is offering …..

Now many things happened in between (I did not puke but) and when I finished my share of chicken and rum, my brother called me up and asked where are you?.....then I remembered the previous night I had promised to meet him near Music world On Brigade Road….so time to go……But how to go ?.....I asked Souravda to drop me ….but seeing his condition I thought it is safe to hire an auto and reach there. One of his friends gave me instruction and helped me in getting auto……Friends…..the story starts from now…… When the auto driver asked me where is my destination?...It took me some time to understand in which language he is speaking. It appeared to me a mixture of English, Hindi and what Muthu and his group used to speak. When I deciphered and replied he started shaking his head and started muttering. I gave a damn to him and was enjoying the ride when that fellow suddenly stopped the auto and said “ Sir, this is the place”. I started looking here and there..Neither did I find Brigade Road written on any of the sign boards of shops neither did I find MusicWorld. When I replied “ areee I asked you to take me Brigade Road and you brought me somewhere else”….He tried to convince me that this is the place and I thought it is better to leave him and walk to my destination . I paid him the fare and he started banging his head with both his hands and kept on saying something in his language. I gave damn to that and started to tread along the road when I suddenly saw Music World in front of me. I thought “ how can this happen?”…Ok….I should not ponder over such trivial matters and started looking for my brother…..After few minutes I realized it is tough for me to find my brother in this crowd and I went to a phone booth to call him( my mobile was there with me!). ….Aaaaahhhh his phone is ringing! I said to myself..He replied “I am standing just in front of the store away from the crowd”……”How can that happen?…I have checked everywhere”….I thought……but anyways these things happen …so I went again and this time I found him and in my usual ways ( guys I think you know) greeted him. His reply was” how much you took this afternoon?”…… I asked “ can you smell it?”……He said “ One don’t have to smell to come to the conclusion “……”Okkkkk”……I thought ……. I took him and his friend to my hotel (It was on the same road). After relaxing for some time, we went to enjoy the night life of Bangalore…..We went to a pub and ordered our drinks and some starters then he said ,” My brother, in Music World, I shouted so much that everyone except you looked at me……It was such an embarrassing situation…”…I consoled him and I felt that one should have one more beer basket on this occasion and ordered another one…….Fine……….after having lots of fun I reached my hotel and asked my friends about the next day schedule. I got a very pleasant answer….any guesses?......There is a cab strike tomorrow and we are staying here ….. I thought ….”what a day!”…I went to my room and found that my roommate did not turn up…..I cursed him in my own way ( you know that) as I wanted to have a good sleep. I started thinking what should I do now?....I can’t lock the door from inside ( as there is only one key and that is with me) neither can I leave the door open…..When I was immersed in all these thoughts the waiter came and asked me “ Sir, do you need something?”..I replied “what you can offer?”……….” anything “he said. I expected an offer like “some good drink, some champagne, chicken or something alike”. His answer irritated me so much that I shouted at him and said “how dare you enter my room without taking my permission?”…..then I realized I kept my door ajar at such late hours and that has some different meaning……

I locked the door and went to bed,tried my best to keep my eyes open, waiting for my roommate to turn up ……..suddenly I don’t know what happened …….I found the bulbs are not glowing and the room is illuminated by a strange light. I got scared and turned to the other side and found my roommate deep asleep…….I was taken aback by this bizarre situation. I went to sleep.

The next morning, I purposely did not ask anything…Had a nice bath in the tub , went to have the buffet breakfast when my friend asked ,” so, you really enjoyed the previous night, isn’t?”…..I said hesitantly “yeah…but how you came to know?”…..”It was evident from the smell in the room” was his quick reply.. “…oooo”…and I could not resist my curiosity, and questioned him “when I came ,you were not there, isn’t it?”. He started laughing and so “what happened”…..and it is :

He knocked for about 10 minutes…..then he went to the reception……called me up through the intercom for 30 minutes…..no answer…….the manager called the concerned person having the keys….he turned up after another 30 minutes. In the meantime he kept on calling me and when that person arrived and he entered the room, he had to keep the door open for another 30 minutes to make the room bearable……..all this time I was sleeping like hell…….

--
Atri

Comments

Sakshi said…
Man... and here I thought Shayon had the capacity.. I sure live in a dream world... *HIC*
Seriously... The competition is heating now... I was laughing like CRAZY...!!!
Shayon said…
Speaking of getting drunk, yes, I too can think of a few incidents of mine. I'll just write about one of them, in the comments section itself.

I remember, it was a Mattu fresher, probably around 2-3 years back. One of our juniors, Pranav, had this habit of hitting the sofas around and sleep blissfully after getting royally drunk. During this particular party of ours, he had just taken refuge in one of the sofas lying around while my eyes wandered upon him. Now, by this time, the party was at its tithers and I had the last bottle of Old Monk in my hand, determined to finish it off, absolutely neat.

Now, when I noticed that Pranav had puked his ass off right beside the sofa and just passed away, I went near him, gave him a hug, asked him if he was alright and got back to our deathly dancing that we used to do, during our college days, while savoring my fav bottle of rum.

Now, it was the next day when I learnt from Mr Dino that, while I had bent down to hug Pranav, the bottle of rum had slipped off my hand and right onto his puke. After our pleasantries, I picked up the bottle very casually and went on to finish it off to a much more colorful night ahead. :-P
Karma said…
@ABC
Bhai I didnot understand half of the incidents you wrote.Two many incidents in too many places and too much confusion.I just understood u were very drunk.Sorry for this unwarranted comment but can you make it more articulate !!!
@shayon
man you and you can only be the winner of this contest.going by the post we have posted till now I guess u will win hands down.
Shayon said…
@Karma
HaHaHaHa...well, the only person, I fear, can claim the title right outta my hands can be Mann and only Mann. It could also be Samik, if course, but I doubt if, owing to his legendary laziness, he has even submitted his entry. :-p
Sakshi said…
@ Shayon
Gross- I don't remember this incident... Well, Yeah, between you and Mannu... its gonna be really close...

Talking of getting drunk... Even I have a incident in my mind... though a must mention is that- Its Only with Shayon around that I am allowed to get drunk... otherwise- My drinking Company i.e. My Cousins, have been given Strict instructions, not get me drunk... coz I become drunk and because of the following incident:
I was with my cousins... basically One cousin Brother, One Cousin sister, My best friend and Myself.. decided to go clubbing pubbing.. we went to one of THE most posh clubbing place called the Vasant Vihar market... while club hopping I managed to down... Lots of Vodka (My capacity is Drunk in 4 glasses of Red Wine)in my same drunk state, I royally messed up ordering food... instead of Vegetarian I ordered Fish for my Pure Veg best friend and she had it too... we ended up paying for an extra dish.. . in a Posh Club and eating food at a dhaba, where, I only had lemons, mind you coz, I was drunk... my cousins had to call up Shayon so that he could talk to me over the phone and keep me calm.. while they ate...and I have no idea what shit did I blabber to him. But I do remember getting one heck of a scolding from him the next day...!!!
I think Atri da was a little tipsy while writting this entry too. He keeps confusing stuff, interupting his dialogue with comments and can't decide whether the bottle was 750 or 350 mL. Ha ha ha ha!
And if there's better entries to come (more hilarious), I can't wait!

D
This comment has been removed by the author.
I think the fight's gonna be between Mann, Shayon and maybe, just maybe Sam (the guy's lazy, but his kaands are legendary!
And Karma, I agree with you, Atri's writting was as confusing as his perpetual look!
LOL

D
Toon Indian said…
ROFL..wow..dude you really reminded me of the time I used to have in colg...good one dude keep it up!!
Sakshi said…
Ok, Before anyone says anything- Rahul was directed to TWM via my profile...!!!
Rathindra said…
mannu had initially forwarded ABC's entry to me for some tweaking. But I just couldn't take the pain of editing ABC's post!!

shayon has just given a sneak peak, seems like the top spot will be a good fight.

hey mannu whrs karma's post, aisa kya entry bheja usney !!


hi rahul, welcome to TWM..
@All
Atri had said that he intentionally wrote such an article with factual errors like 350 ml instead of 750 ml as he wanted to give it a feeling that some real tippler has written this article in a drunken state.
I know the article seems a lot confusing but since it was his idea so i didnt edit it.Anyway,will post the next entry today.Watch out. ;D
raj alakshendra said…
atri boka***** hai ....
Karma said…
@mann

Can you do something about this strange habit of deleting posts/comments...this is blasphemy as far as 'netiquettes' are concerned...nothing in the blogosphere should be deleted....once you post it in a forum it ceases to be yours..better u add lines at the end indicating that this post/comment is unsolicited/uncalled for......I beseech junta that once you post it do not DELETE it!!
@Karma
I agree with you.But,there are times when a comment needs to deleted for some reasons.For eg-sometimes,after posting a comment,I realise the gross grammatical errors/blunders I made and I really don't like that people should read those kind of sentences as I, myself, don't like reading incorrect english -so that's why the comment needs to be deleted.
PS-The comment deleted above was not mine.I guess,Shanoob-MP must have done this thing.Ha ha ha
Sakshi said…
The deleted comment was by Dion... because the same comment which is here...was published twice. That is it.

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