Note:The writer of this article is in no way being judgemental or critical about the American society rather he's trying to put his fascination,confusion & thoughts about it.
The USA-a country with a society which was just an another society to me BUT that was before I got to know it better.Before knowing it well,for me it was just a society which incidentally belonged to the most powerful nation ,a society which doesnt have many so-called "moral chains" or strings attached ,where anyone is not judged by what profession he/she's in as long as he's in his pursuit of happYness(Yes! with a "Y" there) .As they say "Ignorance is bliss" & after getting to know about the American Society fairly well now the clarity with which I looked at it has been obscured by a cloud of questions.
Recently,I read "Scar tissue"-the autobiograpgy of Anthony Kiedies(RHCP frontman) .The book is a real life account of how badly can you screw up your life & then finally make it.Anyway, the way Anthony describes his life, it seems that two things which are readily available in America are drugs & sex.You get the picture that you just walk into a disc or club say "hi" to any girl/guy you like & then it aint very difficult to get laid that very night.Sounds like a cakewalk. Earlier,I was of the opinion that drugs are a big phenomenon there but limited to the glam-world or showbiz but after reading the book it's seems as if the whole America is full of drug-peddlers & druggist.He says that he himself was surprised to find that normal people doing dayjobs could be so big drug-addicts .He not only used to get stoned with his friends but also used to cajole his girlfriends into getting into it & bingo!! they used to do it without giving two hoots about getting addicted or watsoever & the fact that he started doing drugs at the age of 10 (Thanks to his own father!!)is something that maybe a reflection of a large(if not the whole)section of the society & the fact that he was a student of UCLA indicates that he was a part of the mainstream society.
Since I haven't have had the opportunity to live or study in the US, so I really dont know the reality.If what they show in the movies like the American Pie series actually happens then I must say that they are a Goddamn lucky lot.Sex is potrayed as something which is as easily available as a burger or a hotdog(I would really appreciate if Dion can throw some light on this!)If it's so,then do songs like "I'll be right here waiting for you ?" or "Love you forever" mean anything when most of the times the marriages hardly last for even 5 years.I think the songs should be twisted to reflect the real thing."Right here waiting for you till the time i find a new one" or "love you forever (& forever means 2-3 years) till the time I find a new girlfriend/boyfriend".
To make my perception all the more skewed, I got interested in knowing about a weird rockstar-Marliyn Mansion.At first,I thought that whatever he is doing or has done is just an another on-stage/on-screen publicity stunt but
after watching his numerous interviews,I realised that he's not pretending to be sick
he ACTUALLY IS sick.Imagine,this man got his rib bones removed so that he can suck his own *&^%. He is obsessed with setting The Holy Bible on fire on-stage!! I saw him tearing The Bible into pieces in such a violent way that even though I ain't a Christain I was taken back.But this was just a trailer!! The things which disgusted me the most were his videos showing people taking out human brains & EATING THEM!! I almost puked on seeing the videos !! And to tell you how much he's in the mainstream, he's supposed to be "IN THING" among kids.I have heard
kids there, as youngs as 6 or 7 wearing Marliyn T-shirts saying "he's cool". Maybe TOO COOL!!No wonder the Kid responsible for the Okhalama shootout was also wearing one.
I got some more glimpse into the American society with our own Aishwaraya Rai on the
David Letterman show (my fav timepass in office alongwith 'O Reilly show)The Indian beauty queen gave some gud replies but really made a fool outta herself by bursting into foolish laughters now & then, not knowing how to react.
Anyway ,cming to the point I was surprised to see Letterman getting shocked to know that "grown-up kids" live with their parents in India.I know that it's not the norm there for most of the people but does that mean that "joint family system" is an alien concept altogether,something which people havent even heard of ?
(Dion,do "grown-up kids" really have to take an appointment with their parents for things as small as a dinner?)
I know the Americans are a cool lot.They live life to the fullest.Everybody has almost everything ,if not in abundance, but at least so much that they can have a square meal & have the basic necessities.A relaxed education system where the kids are not burdened with studies ,where you can make it into a good university without much effort.But then why is their so much frustration vent inside them.These "Death Metalheads" seem to the most frustrated lot.
(Dion,again throw some light on this too.Also do tell us what is the kinda music
which people listen to.Does the classification that whites -mostly rock,blacks-mostly hip-hop & women -mostly pop holds true ?)
I, indirectly, got some of the answers to the questions that had been circling my mind.Recently in an award function,Sarah Silverman blasted off Paris Hilton & that too with a joke that I cant imagine to be cracked on-stage in India even in 2050(no exaggegration!!).So I concluded maybe the American society is way ahead of our times or maybe WAY TOO AHEAD OF ITS OWN!!
Let us hear what do you folks think on this topic!!
And as far as these american celebs go- They are ppl who will do anything for limelight.
Hmmmm, I was watching this Ben Affleck flick called 'Jersey Girl', there after the death of his wife, Ben dint have sex with any girl for 7 years...!!!
And the truth is- Sex is as easily avbl here in India. The only thing is that here we dont have open talks about it, coz its a taboo. Relationships are as frail... its now that divorce and separation are becoming so abundant, but in olden days when you were stuck with a husband/wife not of your choice or compatibility... you were simply stuck. Is having a fulfilling relationship for a small time good or a relationship you are stuck with minus anything...is better?
I agree, that the American society is way ahead... but we are not that far behind...the only thing that keeps us sane is the customs and the morals that have been instilled in us...
when a child is growing, his environment is very imp...what he sees, comes in contact with...if a child sees usage of drugs/having sex is quite casual & OK, he is bound to follow that...if suppose u would have been born in a madrassa, u could have turned out to be a islamic fundamentalist with strict adherence to norms and strict interpretation of quran...like u said the guys father had drugs, so for him it was quite OK...if someone is a big fan of eminem, he is bound to follow him...similarly, marlin having a cult image among children as one having attitude is quite natural..as for india, we are protected by our parents till the age all values & sanskaars are completely imbibed by us...and they monitor most of our info sources...
i dont think they are way ahead or we are way behind..its just that people being too busy dont have time for each other...something which even we have begun to feel...
they are just different...as are japanese or chinese for that matter...
as for media...do "K" serials on star TV represent real india...
at least they are better of in one thing which even i'vee experienced in company....that they respect their countrymen first...
we indians are opposite....foreigners always take the first place here..the gora chamdi effect...
and as for attitude of indians....educate them and we'll be a superpower....
ever wondered why biharis are exceptionally good at maths...cuz till class 5 they have only one subject in schools and everybody around is in general good at it...something like gujju community being good at business...its the way how u think...the defiition of logic in ur brain..a typical gujju will always measure economic pros & cons of every decision even at chilhood...thats th effect of environment...
As for relationships, if the other person is not completely hopeless, one can work on a relationship and become compatible rather than searching for a soulmate his own life...
having a fulfillin relationship for one year and then moving on??? eh...then that because then u dont know the person for 1st 11 months...
one should search for the best only till a particular time...
P.S. I'm sure my boss dint have a good childhood...
u have written that "one can work on a relationship and become compatible rather than searching for a soulmate his own life..."
Dude its not easy to " WORK ON ". relations are not machines . its the most complication thing in this universe.
(Why do you think there is all that gifting and dates... its just like oiling...)
Apparently none of the bosses have had a great childhood... ;)
But really, sometimes even with all the maintaining the relationship becomes more of a burden... than a completing factor... rather than bringing joy it brings pain and nothing more.
I agree with you when you say that, the family and the upbringing makes a lot of difference. But then personal choices also matter alot.
its complicated not complication